Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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