just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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