This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
