Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
