WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
