Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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