I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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