Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
