i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
