You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
