if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
