Well apparently he's into motor boating.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
