Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize