Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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