Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
