Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
