That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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