Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Randomize