What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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