Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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