Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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