I think im going to throw up on grandma
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
