I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
