The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
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