And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Randomize
