so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
