i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
