i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
