so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
