It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
