marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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