Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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