his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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