Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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