It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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