Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
