everyone is single if you try hard enough
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
