I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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