Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I understand Curling. That high.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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