She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
