Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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