We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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