i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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