do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
