I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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