if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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