Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
