There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
