pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
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