Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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