Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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