Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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