Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
